Friday, March 27, 2009

Disappointed

You know, this may be a completely random blog; but I felt the need to talk about this.

I hate it when people tell me they're disappointed in me. There is no level of guilt that exceeds 'disappointed'. It a horrid curse, that you carry around with you for the rest of your days, until you burn in hell, you fucking sinner! 

Ok, yeah, I kind of got out of control there. :P Um... so... what the fuck am I going on about? I'm gonna go now. Bye.

Dear Megan

Dear Megan, this is a letter to you to remind you of how awesome we are.
Did you know that we've only known each other for like four months?
It feels like fucking forever. I wish we had have met each other earlier, because you are so fucking funny. Honest to God, I rarely meet people who I fall in love with straight away... and you are awesome enough to be one of those people.

You are a minder, a maggot, and a moo-cow. I am a nigga nun. The ratio works out quite nicely, I think. You are the stupid and smelly in the relationship and I'm the sex and the brains. It's perfect!

So... I don't know about you, but I think that we (especially me) are the most awesome team in the world. What would civilization do without us? When we die, I suppose everyone will just commit suicide or something. I mean, what really is the point of living if you and I are dead? There is no reason.

Megan, I love you. You are awesome and far too cool for school.

But please, have a shower.       :D

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

The Honey Story

I did the stupidest thing EVER two nights ago.

I was lying on my bed, watching a pleasant episode of The O.C. I thought to myself, 'I feel peckish'. So i got up and snuck out of my room to the kitchen. My mum was locking up the house and stuff coz she was getting ready for bed. I got to the cupboard and there was absolutely nothing there that I wanted! Occasionally if I feel really hungry at night I'll eat a few teaspoons of peanut butter. It sounds stupid, but for some reason it stops the oncoming starvation.

So I looked deep within the pantry, searching desperately for something, anything to indulge in. And then I found it. A brand new jar of honey. Now, I don't usually like honey very much but for some reason I felt like it at the time. So I took the jar and got back on my bed in my room until I heard my brother yell from nextdoor. I jumped off my bed and walked into his room. He was standing on his bed and yelling about a spider. I was telling him that he was an idiot (even though secretly I'm terrified of spiders too). My mum came in and was too freaked out to kill the thing aswell. So we chased it into the basket and dumped it in the bathroom and closed the door.

All was well... for now. Lol. I went back to my bedroom and cracked open the new jar of honey, savouring that sweet smell. And then, out of the corner of my eye, I saw something move. I quickly spun around letting my grip slacken on the honey jar, but not dropping it. I scanned the wall for maybe 20 seconds and then went to resume my viewing of The O.C. But the honey was pouring out of the lopsided jar in my hand out onto my carpeted floor. This was a BIG jar of honey.

I shat myself. I freaked. I went to pick up the jar and spilt it all over myself. Up my arms and everything. Then I found the courage to look over the top of my bed to see the damage. Luckily most of it spilled onto a conveniently placed thong. But there was still a good 200grams on the floor. I was running around frantically trying to think of what to do and having to hide it from my mother who was still wandering the house at the same time. I had many bottles of water in my room which was lucky. I used them with tissues to help clean the honey off my floor. All in all it took me over half an hour to clean up the entire mess. And when I went to dump the tissues that were soaked in honey in the toilet, I flushed them down, and the toilet began to flood.

And then I waited for it to sink but it wouldn't. So I ran back to my room and grabbed the honey-soaked thong. I walked in the direction of the bathroom so I could clean it under the sink until I remembered... the spider was in the bathroom. I had to clean that fucking thong while there was the huge spider in a basket right at my feet.

After that nothing happened. I put the honey back and my mother never found out. I went and sat down in my bedroom and I thought, 'I'm still hungry'.
So I went and got the peanut butter...

Monday, March 2, 2009

My Favourite Sayings

i was thinking today at school about all of my favourite sayings, because i am full of them.
so i wanted to kind of put it all down on paper (or so to speak).
i don't have any particular favourites, but i think they are all really important and share my personal beliefs.
i know it's lame but i put them in alphabetical order... :P

'a smile is a light in the window of your face to show that your heart is at home'

'a cheat believes that everyone cheats'

'a dream is a reality that is yet to materialize'

'a friend tells you what you want to hear, but a best friend will tell you the truth'

'a true friend will remember you for the good times and the bad times and love you for both'

'always aim for the moon; even if you miss, you'll still be among the stars'

'character is what you do when nobody else is looking'

'DARE TO BE DIFFERENT'

'don't explain. your friends don't need it and your enemies won't believe it'

'DON'T WORRY ABOUT TOMORROW UNTIL IT IS TODAY'

'every end has a new beginning'

'everyone deserves to be loved'

'fall seven times, get up eight'

'friendship is the foundation on which true love is built'

'GO WHERE LIFE TAKES YOU'


i cannot stress this enough, for this particular saying is the very core of who i am as a person...


'L I F E I S W H A T Y O U M A K E I T'

thank you for reading. xx.